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Colonel Cornelius Cornwall

A fictitious colonel who attempts to persuade (and extort) the listener into purchasing corn. Colonel Cornelius Cornwall makes his appearance in a video published by Slimecicle on December 5th, 2018.

"From the earth Colonel Cornelius Cornwall rises, and to the earth he one day will return."

by MinitrueEmployee December 22, 2020

21👍 1👎


Colonel Cornelius Cornwall

From the earth I rise, and to the earth I will one day return.

What's up, mothershuckers? My name is colonel cornelius Cornwall, and I'm here today to introduce you to:

corn

Corn is a North American serial plant. It yields large kernels on a cob.

It is also called 'maize' because of how easy it is to get lost in its incredible flavor.

Side effects of corn may include... Uh, choking, I guess.

Come on down today, and try some corn or we will sacrifice your newborn-

A

'You are such a Colonel Cornelius Cornwall'

by bluevanman69 December 18, 2020

14👍 2👎