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A fictitious colonel who attempts to persuade (and extort) the listener into purchasing corn. Colonel Cornelius Cornwall makes his appearance in a video published by Slimecicle on December 5th, 2018.
"From the earth Colonel Cornelius Cornwall rises, and to the earth he one day will return."
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From the earth I rise, and to the earth I will one day return.
What's up, mothershuckers? My name is colonel cornelius Cornwall, and I'm here today to introduce you to:
corn
Corn is a North American serial plant. It yields large kernels on a cob.
It is also called 'maize' because of how easy it is to get lost in its incredible flavor.
Side effects of corn may include... Uh, choking, I guess.
Come on down today, and try some corn or we will sacrifice your newborn-
A
'You are such a Colonel Cornelius Cornwall'
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