Cute Grandpa

The male version of cute hag.

A pubescent male whom possesses child-like features (not to be confused with femboys or crossdressers, sissies aren't allowed here). Not as strict as cute hags, because masculinity is a beautiful thing, cute grandpas are only a nice addition to it.

So, what does it take to qualify as a cute grandpa? Here's the list:

🎀Face🎀 ~ Just like cute hags, this is essential. Having a neotenous face is everything.

🎀Hair🎀 ~ Anything that isn't bald, has dreads, an afro and karen hairstyle. As for facial hair and body hair, shave it if you don't have a bara build.

🎀Race🎀 ~ Mostly any race can meet the cute grandpa threshold, asains usually stomp on all of them though.

🎀Body type🎀 ~ Ideally anything that isn't obease. Fit will be favored over the rest. Bara builds can sometimes outdo average fit grandpas, Kevin Kaslana (from hi3rd) for example is the perfect combination of both.

🎀Voice🎀 ~ Voices are the most flexible part, any voice will do as long as it isn't feminine.

🎀Personality🎀 ~ Of course, you can't forget about this. Generally speaking, timid, kind-hearted, introverted and melancholic are the most desired personality traits. Bad ones such as sassy, extroverted, arrogant, mean-spirited and aggressive are desposable. However, there are some exceptions with the bad ones, but it is usually the former that wins.

🎉If you check all the marks on this list then congratulations, you've obtained cute grandpa status!🎉

Einstien: I'm sorry, but you completely lost me when you said "masculinity is a beautiful thing" lol. You were being far too harsh on women, and this definition is even more bias than the last one. Also, the fact that you wrote this like you're on Tinder and not on Urban Dictionary has me in tears!

moebarabitch: It's true though, it really is beautiful! Men are objectively better, cute grandpas only double down on that statement. Men (especially bara men) were made for sex, and hags were made to be in the kitchen. "More bias than the last one" Tell me what definition isn't biased on this site, lmfao.

Einstein: You have the worst takes ever. So not only are you a barafag, you're also sexist? Why am I suprised, considering every definition you made? If women weren't made for sex, why do they have vaginas? You know, a sexual organ made for reproduction?

moebarabitch: Good counter-argument, however, did you even bother to take a second at deconstructing my name? Since your reading comprehension is lacking, allow me to do it for you: moe = cute, which I value a lot, (hence the definitions I made) bara = masculine burly men, which I also value a lot, bitch = i'm a bitch (self-explanatiory). I don't hate hags, I just believe in order for hags to unlock their full feminine potential, they must strive to become cute hags. It's a cakewalk for men because as i've already said, and will continue to say until the day I die: masculinity is a beautiful thing.