defcon 5

adj.
n.
A state of crap defecation that is so foul in smell, the defecator must make every attempt possible to relieve himself of the odor.

These attempts may be:
Opening the window.
Turning on a vent.
Spraying Lysol (or other powerful positive odors) around the room.
Covering of the nose.
Opening the door.
Repeated flushing.

And a last resort: Leave the room immeadiatley, hoping the smell will dissipate.

A grumper often results in defcon 5.

Roommate of Defecator: Hey what's that smell?
Defecator: My grumper hit Defcon 5.
Roommate: DEFCON 5!?

17👍 51👎