Doing an Ashley

1. The act of screwing something up, to the extent that is absolutely fucking beyond comprehension.

2. To produce a bowel movement so insidious, that it both clogs the toilet and stinks the fuck out of the place.

Named after Mike Ashley, the rotund owner of Newcastle United FC. Known universally for making a complete cock of himself, and providing entertainment for the sporting world. But obviously not the fans of Newcastle. Known for very bad decisions and for resembling a steaming pile of shite.

See also "ashley".

1. Guy 1: "In Vegas, I bet all my companies assets on red and lost. I picked up a hooker and now have the clap. I was arrested and puked on a cop. They found a bag of coke in my pocket, a bloodied knife, and tomorrow I'm due in front of the judge."

Guy 2: "You're fucked. You've been doing an Ashley again"

2. "Last night I drank a shit load of beer and ate a really spicy curry. Don't go in that toilets for a while as I've been doing an Ashley in there."

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