Dude Code

The subliminal coding imbedded in all guys.

1. No cockblocking

2. Nobody turns down an offer to play football.

3. Leave the seat up, anyone that requires it down either is too drunk to stand up or needs to take a dump.

4. Chat/IM lingo is frowned upon in real life conversation.

5. The only reason why a guy shouldn't be able to change their oil is if they are physically incapable of doing it.

6. There is no reason why one guy should touch another guy's junk, unless it's a physical examination.

7. Shotgun rules are overridden when the driver has a woman with them, whether it is a date, hooker, sister, friend, or bum.

8. Something/someone should only be called gay if there is a dude with a dude.

9. Anything is a sport that requires practice and sweat. Including beer pong, table tennis, and pool(billiards).

10. No male cheerleader should be frowned upon, because they are grabbing your girlfriends ass more than you.

11. A warm beer is never acceptable unless it is yours and your dumbass left it out, then you should be forced to drink it.

guy 1. DUDE! you're breaking the dude code! you pulled off a trifecta!!!

guy 2. ouch. i might as well get naked and wave at the mailbox.

guy 3. douchebags.

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Additions to the Dude Code

I. When sending a pornographic link over IM, appropriately tag it sfw or nsfw.

II. Never admit to a dude's chick the existence of the dude's porn collection.

III. When you lend a dude's chick some money, the dude is responsible for reimbursement, even after he breaks up with the chick.

IV. If you're ever so lucky to find nudie pictures of a dude's hot girlfriend, you are obliged by the Dude Code to, in all discretion, share them with other dudes. (note: via e-mail or IM only!)

No example for additions to the Dude Code.

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