feather in my bottom

A silly, quite dastardly, yet self-inflicted prank played upon my bottom due to dissatisfaction as a result of excessive boredom on this tedious, but increasingly harrowing morrow's eve.

"Sir Raleigh, I've put a feather in my bottom. Oh, do you not believe me? Dearest Raleigh, it behooves me to let loose my knickers, turn round, and trouble you to glance upon the telling feather which mirrors my equally present heart. I trust that this display may end all doubts in me, Raleigh, for I do love you."

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