feathering your nest

Placing lengths of toilet paper on the seat before mounting, to ensure none of your bare ass contacts it.

Never sit on a public toilet without feathering your nest.

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Feather Your Nest

To misrepresent your living conditions in order to impress the opposite sex. The act of completely cleaning, reorganizing, and redecorating your house/apartment in preparation for a lover's first impression.

Bro, you need to feather your nest before Jessica comes over the first time. She'll dumped you if she sees this place without at least a visit from a cleaning service and new sheets and towels.