Ford the River

Featured in the game, The Oregon Trail, fording the river is on of the most diabolical options ever created in the gaming world - aside from the plethora of wrong turns in The Water Temple. The root of its evil plays on the human characteristic of "It's impossible that I could flip my cart and lose 2 oxen, three times in a row." Oh, I assure you, it is VERY possible. You travel 3/4ths of the way across the river, and just when you think you're home free, disaster strikes. NEVER ford a river. NEVER.

Friend: We don't have money to spare, we have to ford the river!

Me: You're right. Let's do this. We have 3 oxen, 600 pounds of food, 100 bullets, and 4 sets of clothes. We CAN make it.

Both: Okay, easy.... easy... we've got it. we've got it! FUCK!

Game: Your cart has flipped. You have lost: 3 OXEN. 600 POUNDS OF FOOD. 100 BULLETS. 4 SETS OF CLOTHES.

Both: FUUUUUUUUCK *crying*

98👍 3👎

Whatever fords your river.

similar to "whatever caulks your wagon", both taken from the classic Apple II Game Oregon Trail. Both mean "Whatever makes you happy"

Me: I'm gonna kick that ginger.

Hunter: Hey man, Whatever fords your river.