Fresh Eggs

fresh eggs | frɛʃ ɛɡz |
noun derogatory New Zealand colloquialism

Naive city folk who move to a rural area with the idea of living a stereotypical “country lifestyle”. Lifestyle blockers who get a chicken on their 0.5ha land and put up a sign at the end of their driveway to sell “Fresh Eggs”.

Town local: “Did you meet the new neighbours?”
Another town local: “Penny and Wade McCarthy?”
Town local: “Yeah. They’re a couple of fresh eggs from Auckland.”
Other town local: “Mate! I just sold them a chook coop for $400.”

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Fresh Cracked Eggs

Busting an early morning nut. Laying your jizz ropes all over yourself, the bed or your partner through sex or masturbation.

She wanted some fresh cracked eggs so I roped her titties up good.

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Fresh Eggs

When a man dips his testicles in hot wax to coat them for safety prior to anal.

Dude, Lauren and I are about to do butt stuff and I got some fresh eggs.