green beard

Said in disbelief, usually in reply to a potentially preposterous or unlikely statement, but can also be in recognition of an act.

Emphasis must be on the "ee" sound of both words, and accompanied by a stroking of the chin, regardless of presence or lack of own facial hair.

see variations at: Beee-aaard, bard, itchy chin, Jimmy, Jimmy Hill

Synonym: "yeah, right!"

Mr. A: My dick is 17.5 inches.

Mr. B: GrEEEEEn BEEEErd

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itchy green beard

An exclamation made when someone is clearly lying. This statement is accompanied by the stroking of an imaginary green beard and a quizzical look on ones face.

Friend: "Dude, I slept with Olivia Wilde last night!"

You: "Yeah and I'm stroking my itchy green beard"

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Shaving my green beard

Similar in meaning to chinny reckon. Used to express disbelief, always with an exaggerated motion of one hand on the chin, as though shaving/stroking an imaginary beard. It means that whatever the first speaker has said is so fanciful or impossible that another impossible thing must be true.

Person A: My grandfather was King Henry VIII.
Person B: Really? And I'm shaving my green beard.

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