Random
Source Code
Random
A sexual act during which the woman's legs are held by the ankles and spread as far apart as possible, while ramming the cock into her with as much force as possible, making the woman fear she will be split in half.
If the act is performed correctly, the fuck profile should perfectly imitate the piston-action of a real log splitting machine.
"Hey Chris, Sherry was complaining all day at work that she was sore and could hardly walk...what did you do to her last night?"
"Well, she was talking shit about how much cock she could handle last night, so I put her ass in the log splitter until she started spraying female ejaculate all over the place in an uncontrolled fuck quiver."
54👍 28👎
An extremely petite woman who any man with a remotely respectably-sized cock would send to the emergency room. Now, add a healthy hog to the equation and visualize the wedge splitting that log right in two!
Guy 1: Hey dude, were you with Jen last night?
Guy 2: Yeah, why do you ask?
Guy 1: Well, she's walking with a huge limp, and looks kinda bow-legged all of the sudden... Dude, I've seen your junk in the shower, and she's probably 90 pounds soaking wet...
Guy 2: I know... The way she was screaming, I almost thought I had it in the wrong hole. Man, Jen sure is a log splitter.
Guy 2 after a brief pause: What the hell are you doing sizing up my wang?
67👍 35👎
Fecal incontinence while wearing thong underwear, most commonly performed by extremely drunk females.
Sally pulled a log splitter last night after she passed out.
8👍 2👎
An extremely petite woman who any man with a remotely respectably-sized cock would send to the emergency room. Now, add a healthy hog to the equation and visualize the wedge splitting that log right in two!
Guy 1: Hey dude, were you with Jen last night?
Guy 2: Yeah, why do you ask?
Guy 1: Well, she's walking with a huge limp, and looks kinda bow-legged all of the sudden... Dude, I've seen your junk in the shower, and she's probably 90 pounds soaking wet...
Guy 2: I know... The way she was screaming, I almost thought I had it in the wrong hole. Man, Jen sure is a log splitter.
Guy 2 after a brief pause: What the hell are you doing sizing up my wang?
34👍 18👎
Inserting your index finger into your rectal cavity while forcing a bowel movement
I gave her the log splitter, now my finger stinks
3👍 2👎
When a woman is having a sex with two men and is being entered orally as well as vaginally or anally, as to be have two penises at either end, simulating a log splitter.
My buddy and I are at the bar when a hot chick comes up to us and says we're both hot and would love for us to give her a log splitter. She said she loves having two guys pour the coals to her at the same time.
1👍 1👎
When a girl wears a thong pantie, and takes a fat shit with it still on. Causing the shit log to split in half and form 2 logs of crap.
Nicole took a fat dump with her thong on, and the shit split into two logs. Now that is a log splitter
29👍 18👎