Matthew barwell

Rugby fan boy who loves grabbing other men and hides the fact that he is homosexual through playing rugby where he lives out his fantasies of touching and wrestling with hunky men. Plays karate and the viola (the gay violin) on the side. He is very insecure about himself and feels better once he boasts about his boring life. He loves to talk about how built and tall he is when in reality he is a skinny guy of average height and hates how low the bus ceilings are as it “hurts his head”. Lives in a valley where everyone shops at Waitrose and is yet to lose his virginity.

Man: constantly talks about himself Girl: yep he’s defo a matthew barwell