more like your wishtory

A phrase you say to someone when they are telling a story about their past and altering it to make them look good

Jessica: "Back in Junior year, I was in such great shape! Half the hockey team asked me to go to the prom!"
Blake: "Bitch, please!! I was there and that is more like your wishtory than what happened. You had 13 more sundaes a week than the average person!"