muffin hands

noun. Hands that are short, stubby, and resemble a muffin when made into a fist.

When Alex tried to punch me with her muffin hands, I fell to the floor laughing because they looked so retarded.

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muffin hands

A terrible affliction affecting a percentage of the public who are characterized by hands made of muffins. However, this malady is only compounded by the additional fact that the person possessing the hands are forbidden to eat their own hands in cases of extreme hunger.
(Note: Although this condition has not been witnessed in the medical field, the term could apply to someone with deformed hands or one who cannot use their hands properly)

I don't know how Dr. Schmidt is able to function in everyday society with such a terrible case of muffin hands.

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muffin hands

It's what it sounds like. It's muffins for hands. More importantly, it's the only choice when your other option is corduroy skin. Regenerative snacks all day, whats not to love?

Anyone: Would you rather have muffin hands or corduroy skin?

Intelligent Person: Muffin Hands