Offensive eating

When sharing a limited amount of food or snacks with one or several of your (often fat) friends, the technique Offensive eating must be adopted.

Offensive eating include activities such as: eating as fast as you can, grabbing huge amounts at a time, hiding away parts for later - all to ensure you get more than your friend(s), or at least the same amount as them. Several degrees of offensive eating exist - the most affective (but also the most obvious to your friends) are licking the entire serving. Be aware: This technique will probably not work on fatties, southerners or poor people.

Host 1: Shit bro, Kenny is coming over later and all we have is one bag of chips...
Host 2: Prepare for some serious offensive eating - Kenny is Louisiana trailer-trash...