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Oprah Winfrey

The Deepak Chopra of talk show hosts. A god to soccer moms everywhere, and an egregious blight on everyone else. While her work ethic and her ability to overcome the horrid obstacles of her early life should be admired, she uses her platform as one of the most influential women on the planet to peddle woo, promote empty, platitudinous feel-good pop psychology horseshit, and give a prominent platform for the often-harmful advice of hacks and charlatans (see Dr. Phil, "psychologist", Dr. Oz, energy-healing quack, Jenny McCarthy, anti-vaccine kook, and, again, Deepak Chopra, for prominent examples). Every time she's on air, she has the opportunity to provide the truth and give people useful information to live by, but instead, kowtows to quackery, clapping like a trained seal in the process. As such, her influence does a disservice to the critical thinking skills of the general public, and should be considered nothing but a pus-filled carbuncle - nay - a malignant cancer on the asshole of Reason by any person who values their critical faculties. Fuck Oprah, and everything that snake oil-peddling, self-important cow stands for!

Bob: Did you watch Oprah Winfrey yesterday?
Greg: No, why?
Bob: She had a psychic come on the show to discuss her new book about crystal healing being used to cure cancer, and why you don't needn't consult a medical professional for treatment any longer. And the stupid, mindless pack of sycophantic soccer moms gobbled it up like it was the fucking Gospel!
Greg: *facepalm* This is why we can't have nice things!

by Dr. Snark, PhD October 25, 2013

148๐Ÿ‘ 10๐Ÿ‘Ž


Oprah Winfrey

A condescending yo-yo dieting and especially wealthy talk show host. She manages to fake empathy with many a fan and brainwash numerous women with cheap advice or quick fixes to life. She appears self centered and completely absorbed with herself for becoming famous. For example when that writer lied to her on her show, it was for lying to the almighty Oprah, instead of deceiving her fans or many other individuals. Instead of taking a real stance on important issues Oprah uses soft media or sob stories to grab ignorant people's attention and create a fan base.

Mrs. One: "Did you see?! Oprah Winfrey put that man who sold her bad Chinese food on trial!"
Mr. One: "Hmm.. shouldn't she focus on the unstable economy or that horrendous war instead of these trivial issues?"

by the exestential onion October 12, 2008

356๐Ÿ‘ 101๐Ÿ‘Ž


Oprah Winfrey

A rich and famous woman who can shit money - Basically, her asshole is an atm.



Oprah Winfrey: -takes a shit-

*5 mins later, goes back to her show.*

Oprah Winfrey: I just took a big shit, now who wants a brand new mansion for free?

by bas fon August 2, 2008

313๐Ÿ‘ 104๐Ÿ‘Ž


Oprah Winfrey

something truly awful

dave: sorry your granma died
me: at least she didnt get Oprah Winfrey

by Mr. debator2 October 9, 2010

77๐Ÿ‘ 31๐Ÿ‘Ž


Oprah Winfrey

The source of all men's problems. THis bitch has ruined all mens lives by teachin women to be more independent and to basically fuck up mens lives. SHE MUST ME STOPPED!!

Oprah Winfrey has fucked up my life because my wife thinks sex is evil due to this fat bitch.

by Giants8189 June 12, 2005

1031๐Ÿ‘ 631๐Ÿ‘Ž


Oprah Winfrey

1954-, television talk show host, actor and all-around American success story.

"Oprah Winfrey is starring in four upcoming movies!"

"Doesn't surprise me, Oprah's a legend."

by golden pineapple August 27, 2018

3๐Ÿ‘ 16๐Ÿ‘Ž


Oprah Winfrey

one sexy motherfucker

Oprah Winfrey can get this pipe

by abby loop July 11, 2018

3๐Ÿ‘ 26๐Ÿ‘Ž