philodendron

Philodendron (n)

A viney green plant with heart-shaped leaves that tends to wander for miles. Often found in concrete pots decorating bars and pubs . Be careful not to get caught up and Tangled into those Vines, they will strangle the life out of you.
Philodendron as a growth native to Italy and it is grown in very shallow dirt. If you attempt to put this plant in deep healthy soil, it can't adjust to a sunny environment. Be chure to leave a very loud war movie or presidential debate playing on TV. The philodendron doesn't thrive well in peaceful situations.
Don't be fooled by the heart shaped leaves ; this plant wards off any type of nurturing, and it's best just to leave it alone in some dark corner of your house.

Betty: "I just love your philodendron!"
Me: "I thought you had your OWN plant?"

Diane: "I bit your philodendron plant. It tastes like chocolate."
Mary Ann: " I wish I had your philodendron! It's awesome!"