playing the recorder

A phrase used to describe playing with a penis, usually with ones mouth.

"Grace was playing the recorder all last night"

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Play a record

Said to shut someone up after they've said something really stupid.

Originated from The Ricky Gervais Show with Karl Pilkington and Steve Merchant. After Karl has said something ridiculous they'll play a song to shut him up.

Ex 1:
Karl: There is a spa in Ohio run by monkeys and they're worried that people will take it away from them.

Ricky: Play a record! There is something wrong with you. You are educationally subnormal.

Ex 2:
Person 1: Did you hear Megan gave birth to dog?
Person 2: How can she do that? Megan is a human.
Person 1: I don't know but I saw it on the news.
Person 2: Play a record. You are an idiot

I play my records backwards

A way to note someone who is awesome, tough, beast or bad ass. Originates from the old rumor that subliminal or "evil" messages were hidden in records and could be heard when played backwards.

--Damn Tony! I just heard you round house kicked Ricky...IN THE FACE!
--Ya...That guy should've known I play my records backwards...Damn I'm a beast.

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