precipitous bowel syndrome

A condition characterized by an inability to detect the need to poop before the situation reaches crisis proportions

Mike was banned from all theatres in the city of Chicago because he suffered Precipitous Bowel Syndrome and would often interrupt performances by leaping from his seat and rushing to the bathroom. The final straw, however, was the day that, enraptured by the performance, he failed to take note of the warning signs and consequently sullied his seat.