Quantum Jerk

Quite a bit like schrodingers box, when a man (or woman) is in the bedroom with the door closed they are in a hypothetical state of both jerking it and not jerking it at the same time.

"Whare the hell is your roommate? " "oh he is pulling the old quantum jerk." "What?" "Well technically in this space and time, he is both beating off and not at the same time due to lack of knowledge but as we can clearly see while I open the door, he is shredding his meat like a mad man on bath salts"