shatter analysis

In the manner of bloodstain splatter analysis, shatter analysis attempts to identify the dietary habits of individuals who spray public toilets with explosive diarrhea.

Investigator: "Judging by the consistency and scale of the cone-shaped spray pattern, my shatter analysis tells me our victim was likely lactose intolerant and had either consumed chipotle, Thai food, or barbecue--followed by a large milk shake for dessert."