you can't shine shit

The subject of conversation, is in such dire condition that any attempt to fix it is futile. A variation of the expression you can't polish a turd.

delusional mayor: The Chamber of Commerce and I will revitalize downtown Hazleton.

honest person: You can't shine shit, Mr. Mayor!

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Shit-shine

the act of wiping your shit on someone's belongings.

Julie pissed me off last night so I gave her car a nice, sloppy shit-shine before I left.

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Shit, Shine, and Shave

The phrase used to tell someone that you are going to get ready for the day.

Friend 1: Are you still going to meet us for lunch in an hour?
Friend 2: Yeah I'll be there I just need to shit, shine, and shave.

shining shit

When your shit is really shiny!!

Bob: URRRGH!
Billy:What the fuck is that!?!
Bob: it's my shining shit
Billy:wow !!!