Squirt Sheets

Noun.

The cold, wet bed linens that come as the aftermath of a passionate, sexually-rewarding session that resulted in the female's expulsion of body fluids of genital origin (also known as ejaculate or, colloquially, as squirt).

My dear son,

That skank you slept with last night left a whole mess on your bed. I ain't washing your squirt sheets again this time!
Mom