stealth shopping

when what your shopping for is so embarrassing you have to go miles out of your way to the farthest possible shopping destination lest someone recognize you, wear a disquise, and try to buttress your embarrasing purchase by purchasing other less embarrassing items, and hiding the embarassing item at the bottom.

An example of stealth shopping:

Myself: Yes, I'll take four or five of those porno mags, a box of tampons, these condoms, this industrial-sized jar of lube, and *mmrmfllemng*.
Cashier: I'm sorry, so you want this BRITNEY SPEARS CD also?
Myself: YEAH! Please. Announce it over the freakin' PA, why don't you!??!!!
Cashier: Ma'am, your mustache is falling off.

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