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a BIG ass fuckin dildo, most of the time is double sided. the chick screws the 2 ends together (o=====+=====o) ,then she sticks it up the guys ass and then proceeds to fuck the excalibur.
-friend: Man, why the hell are u walking all retarded and shit?!?!?!?
-the victim: I was real drunk... that fuckin bitch tied me down,...and then...and then she...she pulled out the EXCALIBUR!!! :(
8👍 2👎
What the lady of the lake presented to Arthur, King of the Britains.
The who?
The Britains.
Who're the Britains?
You - I - We all are!
And I am your king.
Well I didn't vote for you.
You don't vote for kings
Oh, well I could be king then.
Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no base for a system of government. Let's face it: If I went around saying I was emperor because some broad launched a scimitar at me, they'd cart me away!
406👍 120👎
Excalibur was given to Arthur by the Lady of the Lake AFTER he had already become King of Brittan by taking the sword from the stone and anvil outside of the church in London.
Excalibur was given to Arthur by the Lady of the Lake along with a magic scabbard which provented him from ever loosing blood
142👍 45👎
The Excalibur is when you plunge your phallic sword into the butt of an unsuspecting damsel. In surprise, she clentches her quivering ass cheeks together, clamping your meat saber in the dark recesses of her "dragon's lair." Now, you must choose your destiny by pulling your sausage machete out of her butt jungle. If you can accomplish such a feat, you will become the king you were born to be. And then hoagie slap her with your shit-covered dick.
"Hey, Wanda, why are you sitting on a hemorrohid donut?"
"Because some gas station attentant performed the Excalibur on me in the women's restroom and became a king. Heavy lies the crown, and heavy lies my rectum, which is dripping out of my anus."
"Hey, Carla, can you pick my sphincter up? It fell on the floor after a hobo did the Excalibur to me last night."
184👍 62👎
To take something humble and make it awesome.
"My old computer was lame so I excaliburated it by adding more ram and a better video card."
"I plan to excaliburate my car as soon as I get a little bit of extra cash."
13👍 2👎
One of the greatest weapons of the deity named Satou Kazuma, the deity of true gender equality, the king of pantsu thieves, and the holder of the greatest weapon known to male, female, bisexual, homosexual, transexual, and pansexual: Chunchunmaru.
It is also the smallest weapon that is no longer than 2 inches max.
Person A: Bro! Bro!
Person B: Yes, bro.
Person A: I have an identical sword similar to the our diety, Kazuma, bro!
Person B: What is that, bro?
Person A: The great Excalibur, bro!
Person B: This is why you're still a virgin, bro.
12👍 2👎
The name of an all powerful sword in soul eater that according to legend is very powerful but in reality he is just a pain in the ass that looks like a peguin that has a top hat and a cane that got its face smashed. He also loves to say FOOL! and is the best charicter ever.
Me: now presenting the pain in the ass excalibur!
Excalibur : FOOL!
me: ( trying not to throw him off of a mountain)