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applectomy

A medical condition in which prolonged usage of Apple technology results in degenerative brain diseases. Applectomy is subsequently branched into a wide variety of symptomatic illnesses based on the level and type of exposure to Apple products.

Decreased Motor Cortex Stimulation: Prolonged usage of Apple's touch screen technology will result in the degeneration of the motor cortex. Resulting in a loss of fine motor skills and overall finger dexterity needed to finely manipulate items. Items such as a keyboard.

Appsosis: A debilitating mental illness brought about by chronic exposure to the Apple iPhone's third party applications causes dementia and neurosis among patients overly engrossed into their recently purchased "app".

I-Form Dyslexia: A learning disability that stems from habitual usage of Apple's "i" products i.e "iPod", "iPhone", "iMovie". Patients begin to refer to objects with the prefix lowercase "i". Referring to a pet dog as "iDog" or a friend as an "iFriend" is a sign of I-Form Dyslexia

Jim: Hey Sarah how are you doing today?

Sarah: *In profound vegetative state*

Jim: Sarah please stop using your iPhone, Please! Your family needs you...

Sarah: *In profound vegetative state*

Doctor: I'm sorry Jim but she's suffering from late stage applectomy. Her brain has atrophied from prolonged use of her iPhone.

Jim: God no....

by Define Me! March 21, 2009


frat flops

Large bulky mandals commonly worn by frat brothers during the warmer months. Specifically, frat flops are commonly Adidas slides with the single velcro or solid footstrap.

Jessica: Like oh my god... Mike Weller is so cute! He so jacked and tan. He's a Tau Beta Epsilon. I so wanna jump his bones!

Madison: Yeah, he was at Drake's party yesterday. Him and Drake were wearing these god awful huge white frat flops with the velcro footstrap... But he's got a cute butt.

by Define Me! May 26, 2009


skanktronica

A sub-genre of electronica music typically defined by its lackluster quality, pop music structure, and annoying and overbearing vocals. Vocalists are usually talentless tone deaf women that are limited to one octave range... guttural shouting.

Vocalists are usually decked out in outrageous fashion forward costumes, makeup, or create sexy eccentric (sexcentric???) personalities to detract from the obvious... Their music is only worth a cheap hip jiggle by some inebriated floozie on the dancefloor.

Over compressed preschool-level drum beats and bland uninspiring synth leads typically carry the song along. Often receives immense airplay from brainless Top 40 radio stations. Example of skanktronica include: Ke$ha, Cascada, Lady Gaga, and the Paradiso Girls.

Jill McClubslut: "Patron! Tequila! Me and my mamacitas..."

Leslie: What are you listening to?

Jill McClubslut: Oh it's the Paradiso Girls. They fucking rock! DJ Dweeby McMainstream was spinning this along with Ke$ha's "Tik Tok" down at SCENE 61 last night. This stuff is my going out anthem!

Leslie: Ohh... well it's a bunch of skanktronica if you ask me. Pure cheese. May I suggest Imogen Heap?

Jill McClubslut: What! She totally sampled that Jason DeRulo song!

Leslie: *facepalm*

by Define Me! January 15, 2010


batmap

To know the byways, alleyways, side streets, and thoroughfares of a particular locale.

Describes an ability to deftly navigate oneself via extensive knowledge of one's surroundings. Such an ability alludes to the urban prowess of Batman.

Jasmine: *swerves car down a sketchy alleyway*

Ivan: Jas' where the hell are we going?

Jasmine: Oh, this is a little shortcut to Jen's house. You can avoid three stoplights this way. I've got my neighborhood batmapped!

Ivan: Tell me about it... I've never seen someone know eight different ways of getting uptown on a Friday night. This is your Gotham City.

Jasmine: I got this whole town batmapped!

by Define Me! June 15, 2010


skankaroni

A tantalizing pub dish best served in the wee morning hours. Upon spending a foggy evening indulging in your favorite scotch, draft, or brew; skankaroni is the only meal a man needs to sate his drunken lust for coitus.

In an empirical sense, skankaroni is defined as sexual congress with an "attractive" female with gregariously skanky sexual proclivities. Skankaroni, alludes to the quick and convenient meal, Kraft macaroni and cheese. It's cinch score that any man worth his mettle can master.

Coke & Captain Morgan Douche: *Pelvic thrusting* Hurry up! Let's hit up The Scottsdale Bar tonight. Word on the street is the skankaroni there is buffet ready!

Monster & Grey Goose Douche: *Sculpts blowout* Hell yes! The Scottsdale Bar is featuring DJ Wiiesto tonight. Hey... What the hell is "skankaroni"?

RedBull & Patron Douche: *Shaving chest* What! Bro'nie Madoff you haven't heard of skankaroni? It's possibly the best way to hook up! Just spit some game in a club skank's ear and she'll give it up easy... like Kraft Easy Mac!!! Get plate son! You dining on skankaroni and cheese tonight!

by Define Me! November 30, 2009


baysoline

A petroleum derived liquid mixture. Primarily used as fuel for the numerous explosions typically seen in films directed by Michael Bay.

Baysoline is a colorless volatile liquid among a series of movie-made aromatic hydrocarbons. Dangerously unstable and highly toxic, the combustion of baysoline is a extremely exothermic reaction. Perfect for Michael Bay directed movies, small amounts of baysoline produce large volumes of hot gas.

Head Pyrotechnician: Careful unloading those barrels Drew! There's enough Baysoline on that truck to turn this set into a 90 minute display of epic Decepticon pwnage!

Drew: Jesus Christ! Why does Michael need all this fuel?

Head Pyrotechnician: Well when you're movies hardly have any relevant dialog or plausible storyline... Shoot you're gonna have to fill three-quarters of the film with perfectly shot explosion scenes.

Drew: Are we that Baysoline-dependent?

Head Pyrotechnician: I guess when Shia LeBeouf and Ben Affleck are you're lead actors... Then yes.

Michael Bay: QUIET ON SET! Camera?... Sound?

Clapperboard Operator: Jailbait Boobsplosion: Revenge of The Augmented, scene 24, take 3!

Michael Bay: aaaaaaaand ACTION!

by Define Me! July 27, 2009


Flo Ripoff

The disparaging nickname of Florida native and pop rap artist Flo Rida.

The nickname Flo Ripoff stems from Flo-Rida's ridiculous usage of samples of other songs in his own productions. Basically, Flo-Rida is known to rip off other artists and steal their choruses and hooks.

The most atrocious examples of Flo Ripoff are "Right Round" and "Sugar". "Right Round" samples the chorus from the Dead or Alive 1984 hit "You Spin Me Round" and "Sugar" the song's chorus is a blatant ripoff of Eiffel 65's "Blue (Da Ba Dee)".

Justin: Mmm!... Yeah!! You spin my head right round, right round!

Darnell: Hey man, what are you listening to?

Justin: It's Flo Rida's "Right Round" this stuff gets the shorties poppin at the club! Have you heard of Flo Rida? This dude goes hard!

Darnell: Yeah, more like Flo Ripoff...

Justin: Don't hate bro, Flo Rida's joints be bumpin!

Darnell: Yeah right, at the expense of jacking the hooks of other songs. Flo Ripoff is corny as hell.

by Define Me! May 26, 2009