Doggo

What retards call dogs

Twat: look, a cute wittle doggo
Carer: I'm wasting my time with you aren't I.

Yasemin

Not my grandmother's name.

"Did you not hear me?! My grandmother's name is not Yasemin, it's Edna and she doesn't need any mugs!"

Obese Person

A big fat fatty with the head of a ratty and if they fall on you, you'll go splatty.

Non-Obese person A - Look, an obese person.
Non-Obese person B - SHUT UP! They'll hear you!