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Any product that is poorly designed, easy to hack, bloated, annoying to use, laggy, full of unwanted features, or prone to frequent malfunction.
Not always necessarily a Microsoft product or even any kind of software.
“Sorry I’ll be a little late to the meeting, Teams is being a Microsoft product again.”
“That new game I got off Steam last month crashed five times while I was trying to play it. What a Microsoft product.”
“My new bike’s frame has already started to bend and break like the Microsoft product it is.”
Events that will happen in every man’s life at some point.
Examples of male canon events include:
>drawing comics as a kid
>playing video games with the boys
>fumbling your first crush
>realizing you hate being in school
>fantasizing about saving your crush from some violent entity
>holding the flashlight for your dad
>graffitiing something
>realizing you gotta hit the gym
>wanting to start a YouTube channel
>realizing that you’ll never be good enough at your favorite sport to go professional
>hating your first job
>realizing how badly you need to fix your life at 3 am
>watching your friend group evaporate after HS
>living in an apartment and refusing to decorate it
>wondering if you’d look better bald
Short for "Go touch some grass".
Meaning go outside and do something other than playing video games or doomscrolling on social media.
Alex: DUDE I JUST WON A REDDIT ARGUMENT ABOUT HOW MY GENSHIN IMPACT WAIFU IS THE ONE AND ONLY "BEST GIRL"!
Bob: GTSG, dude.
A Paul Arc is when you’re single and using that time for growth. It could mean self improvement, growing in faith, working out more, breaking addictions, or starting a business.
Named after the Apostle Paul, who was single for his entire life. Rather than fretting about it, he used the spare time to help the early church grow and urged young men to do the same.
Jack and Chad both got dumped around the same time. Jack spent the whole year moping about and whining about it, and is still single to this day.
Chad took a different approach: he went on his Paul Arc. He got on a workout routine, started reading his Bible every day, started a business selling nutritional supplements, and got married about five years later.
A centrist who is full of bad faith arguments and is willing to defend any political stance so long as it’s awful. Typically, they’ve been entirely bought out by whatever corporation dominates their state.
My congressman thinks unions and minimum wage hikes are extremist, but he wholeheartedly supports private strikebreaker forces. He thinks renewable energy and EVs are a socialist pipe dream, but he voted yes to an additional $85B in oil subsidies. He called universal healthcare is overpriced, but voted to continue the war in Berserkistan.
Literally nobody in our district supports him because he’s a centroll.
Jay Dyer’s Rule of Nutrition states that you should never eat anything that has cartoon characters on its package. Basically, processed junk food.
Dyer’s Rule of Nutrition would rule out:
>Cocoa Pebbles
>M&Ms
>Cheetos
>Flintstones Gummies
>Count Chocula
>Lunchly
In a video game, a critical hit that occurs when a normal hit would have killed the enemy. Typically annoying in that the crit would have been desired when the enemy was at full health.
An example of a cosmetic crit in Fire Emblem: Three Houses
*Felix goes to fight some enemy*
*He has a 40% chance of landing a crit on the enemy*
*first hit: 34 damage, enemy is almost dead*
Player: Dang, no crits.
*enemy punches Felix back, Felix takes 10 damage*
Player: Would have avoided it if he’d gotten the crit, but oh well.
Felix, going for the killing blow: I’LL CUT YOU DOWN!
Player: Seriously, Felix? You couldn’t have gotten that earlier?