Aardvark Tits

Tits that resemble an aardvarks snout

Long droopy boobs like an ant eater nose

Check out those aardvark tits

Deflated

My tits

Once lovely round grapefruits with nipples pointing clearly straight ahead

Now like used condoms dangling from my clavicle with the nipples clearly pointing south

Breast feeding is great for the kids but horrendous for your tits

My tits are so deflated when I sit down my nipples land in my tummy button

Hangers Hoist

Aka a pair of shoelaces aka zip ties

Use them on your tits to stop them touching your belly

Use rope or string or anything really. Even wear a bra if you have to

Her: Whats with the shoelaces?
You: I'm going to give you a hangers hoist

Agathokakological

When something is both good and bad at the same time. Like a woman with a perfect arse but the most hideous tits

She is agathokakological

Scones

Violated tits

Empty, deflated, horrible looking knockers

I find your scones offensive to my eyes

Air Pockets

Deflated empty tits

Tits that look like two skin pockets in need of filling. With the nipple right at the bottom misrepresenting where the button should be

I love my girlfriend I just wish she didn't have air pockets for tits

Paps

Medium sized tits that have the texture of an old fashioned car horn. All that's missing is the honking sound. Be great it they did make a honker honker sound when squeezed

Nice set of paps