hot as a swampy anus

simile. 1: A term used to describe a room, piece of clothing, or other enclosed space that is uncomfortably hot and stuffy.

"Yeah, well it's hot as a swampy anus in this thing, so I'd appreciate it if you just told me what the hell I'm supposed to do, so I can do it."

quantum singularity

n. 1: Like a black hole, only portable, and with a cooler name.

"Quantum singularity? Is that bad?"
"It's like a black hole, only portable, and with a cooler name."

Linderize

v. 1: An action which consists of one repeating a joke, pun, or otherwise humorous action in quick succession until it ceases to be humorous. (American in origin, based on one Mr. Linder who performed the above action to no end)

"Hey! Knife to see you!"
"Stop that. You're Linderizing it."

Jeyboard

n. 1: A term used to describe a keyboard which is below average, old, outdated or otherwise ill-suited to get the job of typing done. (American in origin, derived from a misspelling of the word 'keyboard' when typed on one such instrument)

I need to go to the computer store or something... This jeyboard is really pissing me off.