Seg

Short for segment, segamatron, seggie, segmeena and segatron (a variation on segamatron), a Seg is a creature of very small stature, likened to a hobbit, of JRR Tolkien fame. They feed on blackcurrant cordial and baked potatoes, and move around in a shuffling manner. They are extremely rare and have often had other animals, such as kia, the wife of the famous willow mistaken for them.

Fo shizzle segamatron, you is lookin supa-fly in eric 2day.

deep sea diving

To go down on a woman (give her oral sex).

I went deep sea diving last night.

splatter special

What happens the morning after a curry (or any other spicy food) when you find yourself racing to the bathroom to empty your bowel before you foul yourself. The shit seems to spray everywhere.

I experienced a splatter special last night, and was forced to wipe down the seat cos it was covered with shit.

The Oxford

An old mans pub, inhabited by losers.

I would never go to The Oxford, what a shit pub.

talkin 'em

While talking to a female, you are faking a coversation with the female but are in fact talking to her clevage(breasts, knockers, funbags, and whatever you like to call them).

Man, Dave and Pete were talkin 'em hardocre last night at the club, but thank god they didn't get caught.

sausage hang

When you get to a bar and there are too many guys.

That place last night was a sausage hang.

bits and pieces

Collective term for a list of items or things.

'I've got a few bits and pieces to do then i'm going out'