programmer

One who can read the following example

if( !User.IsProgrammer ){
return "Everyone Else";
}

programmer

Semi-sentient being who inexplicably survives an extremely unhealthy lifestyle. Usually found in confined spaces with low lighting, at a computer terminal.

"Programmer A : The internet is serious business.
Programmer B : Very serious."

programmer

a term that refers to a nocturnal machine that turns keyboard strokes into errors and infinite headaches at 3am everyday.

"I'm a programmer."
"go git commit die"
"ok"

programmer

Someone whose computer has afflicted them with Stockholm Syndrome

Person 1: Hey, man what do you do for a living?
Person 2: Oh, I'm a programmer.
Person 1: Oh no, you need to see a therapist.
Person 2: No, it's okay; I know my computer really loves me.

programmer

A person paid to be a professional Googler

Oh look a professional programmer(googler)

programmer

A dood that Builds code for everything on your Computer. He understands a whole bunch of code that may look like jibbirish to you.

A programmer can understand this:

#!/usr/bin/perl
my@"A,M";
my@"N,Z";

if input="(@'A,M'; 'N,Z')";
print"asdf"
}
else
{
print"qwerty"

programmer

It is really difficult to say what is programmer. On computer's language this means "The Lord", though...

1001010010100101: 1001011010010110, how are you today ?

1001011010010110: Thanks Programmer, I have low load now, my processor cools down...