Jesus fuck me christ

What one says when scared so much they become angry.

Game: *Jumpscare*

Danny: AHHH!!!
Arin: JESUS FUCK ME CHRIST!

step out and meet jesus

Taking a risk or some initiative....most often used by Texas women and associated with pulling out into traffic.

**while waiting behind a car to turn onto a contested street and they’ve missed a few chances**
“Some people just don’t know how to step out and meet Jesus”

jesus take me to the playoffs

When you can’t make the playoffs in madden so you ask Jesus to take you to the playofffs after Jesus floats magesticly down naked and says “if you want to be taken to the play offs the play offs gotta be taken to you” and then you say ok Jesus do what you gotta do and then he says “ good cause I’m gonna FUCK YOU LIKE I FUCKED THAT PIG” *looks at pig * “oh my god it’s in half was it like that when you fucked it” Jesus says “no” then you ask “how long is it” then Jesus responds in a soft soothing voice “ longer than the pig”

I screamed jesus take me to the playoffs and then Jesus floated down and fucked me with a cock longer than a pig

Jesus Christ on a bloody bike

This term will most likely be heard in the uk. It is used when surprised or appalled.

Mike:(gives Derek a fright)
Derek:Jesus Christ on a bloody bike!!!

See jesus Christ

Jesus Fucking Christ on a Bicycle

Interjection indicative of trouble, something wrong

"Jesus fucking Christ on a bicycle! Slow down, but don't stop." Mr. Wednesday in Neil Gaiman's American Gods, Part 2, Chapter 12.

the second cumming of jesus christ

A really wierd porn film.

"Hey man did you see the second cumming of jesus christ."
"No, im not into that wierd shit."

jesus christ on a coke binge

jager, grey goose vodka, gold schloger, and red bull... on the rocks.. get at me

"Hey man instead of doing that blaster lets get a jesus christ on a coke binge!!"