Turtle-bite

When a man is peeing and he pinches his balls in his belt buckle but cannot remove them straight away because if he does he will end up missin the bowl and pissin everywhere. He just has to endure the pain until his piss is over.

I just got a heavy turtle-bite over behind those bushes. Ow, fuck!

Nested Turtle

1. When the head of the pecker protrudes into the shaft creating a image like a turtles head hiding in its shell.

“As the winter began in pecker town, all the men started to feel a strange sensation. Owen asked why his weiner appeared to look like a turtle hiding in his shell. Vagman, (the man with the 12 inch shlong) Shouted, Hahahaha you have a nice nested turtle going.”

Jon's Turtle

Jon's everything. Mom, dad, sister, dog, best friend, EVERYTHING. Not to be confused with Jon's tortoise

Person: "Hey Jon, how's your Jon's turtle"
Jon: "o_o"

Baseball Turtle

Someone who is slowly covering the bases of a relationship over a period of time. Taking a relationship slowly.

Teddy's a Baseball Turtle with Anthony. It's been six months and they've only gotten to second base!

Cut The Turtle

“Cut The Turtle” (verb): To get over one’s hangover, by drinking a gin and tonic. Other drinks can also be consumed whilst cutting the turtle. Generally or more often so, spirits.

“Mate, I’m f*cking hungover!”

“You need a G&T mate, you need to Cut The Turtle”

durty turtle

When your turtle head peaks out too far and leaves a stain on your undies.

Hey Honey, can you wash my undies for me? My durty turtle left a big stain on them.

Garden turtle

A bloke who sucks himself off watching wetsuits dry on the clothesline

Get out of here Blake you dirty garden turtle!!!!