Random
Source Code
Random
when you go to the bathroom thinking you need to shit but after several minutes on the toilet of waiting you don't go at all until hours later.
false alarm anthem:
here i sit
broken hearted
tried to shit
but only farted
When your pants bunch up at the precise area in which you would usually store an erection thereby creating the illusion of arousal.
Generally speaking, discovery of such a false alarm usually comes at the hands of someone who is familiar with you nether regions and would feel comfortable enough testing it out.
I thought he'd finally gotten over his fear of intimacy so I went to grab and just got a handful of Levis... yup, it was just a false alarm.
when you think you impregnate your girlfriend even though you use two condoms
dude, it was just a false alarm, she finally got her period, it was subsequently delayed by the kidney infection....which i gave her
Is when you spot a chick that you think is working with something, that looks good from far away and then when you get a closer look she ends up not meeting expectations
Damn! she look like she got a donk oh wait........never mind false alarm :-(
Having the need to go poo. Once getting to the toilet, nothing seems to come out. You decide to go later on during the day when you really need to go.
Daughter: Mom. Hurry up in there! I have to drop a deuce!!
Mother: Okay
Daughter: sitting on toilet..."Why isn't anything coming out?
Daughter: FALSE ALARM!!! I guess I should wait and try again later.
After flatulating with unusual warmth, this feeling of warmth impresses on the perpretator a sense of anguish, dismay, and shock, because the perpretator had thought he/she (most likely he) had produced a solid instead of a gas.
FART
(user checks pants)
Interesting...that fart was extraordinarily warm.