iPhone face

The face of an actor who is playing a character in a period piece but has a modern looking face– like they would know what an iPhone is.

Omg the cast of Daisy Jones and the Six all have iPhone faces.

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blunch

First meal of day eaten at lunchtime. As opposed to brunch which is eaten at 10 or 11, blunch is eaten at 12 or 1.

I wasn't hungry in the morning so I had blunch.

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gold bricked house

A medium to large sized house, that is well kept yet vacant - having been bought by banks, house flippers or speculators for the sole sake of investment, like a gold brick, rather than being used to live in. One of the major reasons for the high prices of housing, and also the shortage of 𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 housing.

Drove through this nice neighborhood, but noticed a lot of empty homes with no "for sale" signs. But later I found all those houses are half a million each, even though they aren't that big. Seem those empty homes are gold bricked houses.

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Almond mom

A mom who is stuck in dieting culture. The mom who projects their fears of fat phobia onto their own kids. The mom who thinks she is doing good for their kids but is really causing trauma. The term originates from “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills”.

“I hated my almond mom. She would always make comments about my weight”

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Zebra

An obscure illness, disease or condition affecting a comparatively small number of people, but with symptoms somewhat similar to one or more different and more common illnesses.

It is named because these diseases/conditions are sometimes misdiagnosed by well meaning (but often inexperienced) doctors when something far more common is actually the cause. Medical students are told "remember, if you hear hoof beats, think horses, not zebras".

Doctor 1 - "I think this patient may have Castleman's disease"
Doctor 2 - "Castleman's disease is a zebra, there are far more likely causes of his fever and weight loss."

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No Shot

When there is absolutely no chance that something happened/or is true. The phrase first gained popularity when it was heard echoing from a shipping container somewhere in Austin, Texas. It can even be traced back to an individual named Tyler "Dimmadomefuck" Niknam, from whom it spread like a virus.

It is typical for people who have adapted this phrase to use it continuously to the point where it becomes frustrating. Saying "No shot" ad nauseam has been linked with heavy cocaine use and having sudden bald spots appear.

"I did not commit the murder, i swear!"
"No shot, bucko! Vote him out."

"There should be equal treatment of men and women in this workplace."
" NOOO Shot!"

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Velcro Kitty

A annoying neurotic housepet that craves affection like a addict craves drugs. If you start petting it, it will expect you to keep stroking it and rubbing it under the chin indefinitely. You push it off you 98 times, it crawls back on you 99 times, purring, rubbing, kneading, licking, drooling, and looking cute. A black bottomless hole of need. It sticks to you and can only be removed with force, a condition known as Cattic Cling. These episodes frequently occur when unsuspecting human target is playing a computer game or reading a book or trying to write. Putting on formal or expensive clothing that shows every single cat hair can also trigger velcro kitty behavior.

My cat has gone all velcro kitty on me and won't leave me alone.

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