crystal licker

Derogatory name for a new age hippy. Typically known for an unhealthy obsession with inanimate objects like rocks and stones. Believing they have souls, they communicate and make love to them under the moonlight.

Dude 1: Whos that? She's hot!
Dude 2: That's Zoe, but she just changed her name to Moonchild and stopped shaving her legs.
Dude 1: Gross! What a crystal licker.