Wood-Elf

A Wood-Elf, in its natural environment, is found on a golf course. When teeing up his/her golf shot the Wood-Elf is known to swing violently at a golf ball resulting in either an extreme slice or hook. Generally, the resultant shot will end in the nearest wooded area. The Wood-Elf will then disappear, into said wooded area, and later emerg, magically, with many golf balls as if he or she was a leprechaun holding a pot of gold. The Wood-Elf is a formidable golfing opponent where regardless of the amount of balls launched into the woods his/her score will often result in either a Par, Birdie and on rare occasions an Eagle. The Wood-Elf is quick-witted and at times charming but resist the temptation to play the Wood-Elf for money. You will lose.

Known celebrity Wood-Elf: Andy Dick

When scoring at the end of the hole a conversation may be as follows:

You: "Hey Wood-Elf, what did you end up with?"

Wood-Elf: "Par"

You: "How many times did you hit your ball into the woods?"

Wood-Elf: "Two or Three times."

You: "Wow that's amazing, how on earth did you end up with a par?"

Wood-Elf: "A Wood-Elf never reveals his secrets."

2👍 6👎

Unwilling Wine Stein

The Unwilling Wine Stein is a "wine" of choice, unknowingly spiked with quaaludes and served in a beer stein to conceal the impurities.

Typically served at frat parties but has gained popularity in the Hollywood rape culture

Aptly named after Hollywood producer, Harvey Weinstein.

I went to a Hollywood party last weekend, drinking wine from a beer stein... next thing you know, some fat guy is yanking out my tampon and eating my pussy.

I think I drank the Unwilling Wine Stein