The Prodigal Lesbian

A Born-again lesbian that reverts back to romantic relationships with men.

My cousin married a man shortly after college, had two kids, then came out as a lesbian when she was 30. She dated women and got lesbian married. She still had feelings for men, though so she got lesbian divorced and became The Prodigal Lesbian: she’s now returned to dating men.

An angry mule’s kick

Pretty close, but not super close. Approximately 12 feet.

I’m only an angry mule’s kick away from town.

A God’s Plenty

The G-rated version of a “fuck-ton.”

I don’t need anymore; I’ve already had a God’s Plenty.

Dooper

Another name for the male genitalia.

You better zip your fly or you’ll show everyone your dooper!

Born-again lesbian

A current lesbian that use to be married to a man and had children. After years in an unhappy relationship, she came out as a lesbian and married a woman.

I just saw a couple of born-again lesbians in the airport. I could tell they use to be married to men because their adult children were with them.

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