Andrew

Has the personality of a house plant. Their sense of humor is non-existent, remember, house plant. Listens to Mmm-Bop on repeat while showering and eats stale cereal with water for breakfast. Likes to go to dog parks (with no dog) to purposely step in dog poop. Will show up at random birthday parties at public parks claiming to be the real father of the child who's birthday it is. Does not cover their mouth when coughing and sneezes directly into the pathway of other people. And if other people sneeze around them, they yell "shut the fuck up" instead of bless you. Always pees on the toilet seat and does not wipe. Spits against the wind when riding their bike. Their clothing style is usually spot on though, so I guess there's that going for them.

Who is that guy over there? He smells like shit, has dry spit on his face, and told me to shut the fuck up when I sneezed.
Oh, that's Andrew.