Calculus

A device thought up by the government to keep high school and college students feeling dumb and therefor keeping them from begining a rebellion.

1: "Down with our capitalist government! Viva la Resistance!"

2: "Sorry, dude. No can do... Failing calculus. Gotta study up."



1: "Mr. President, we feel this generation of high schoolers think they're smart enough to overthrow the government. What is our best course of action?"

2: "Hmm... Raise the national grading scale for calculus."

1: "Brilliant!"

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MDSS

Acronym for Missed Day Stress Syndrome.

Usually developed by math/geometry/calculus student when a single missed class causes a complete hole in their knowledge of the chapter. Syndrome can be brought on by a bitchy teacher who refuses to teach you at a different time, a book that describes everything in 40,000 words, or a friend who sucks at explaining their processes. The only known relief methods are to either fail the chapter or drop the class.

Patient: "Doc, I just, I missed a day and now I'm so behind! This section is used throughout the whole chapter! I can't do the rest without it! Ahh!!! HELP ME!!!"

Doctor: "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid you have MDSS... There's nothing we can do..."

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