Ext Message

Very similar to any ordinary text message, except these are always imflammatory, hateful, insulting, belittling, and generally negative in content, and always from the girl or guy you just recently dumped in a very painful, and likely humiliating, manner.

Me: Oy. You know how I broke up with Lynn on Sunday night? I woke up this morning and checked my phone, and had 33 different mails from her. She, uh, has quite the potty-mouth.
Jeff!: Nothing but Ext Messages, huh? Surprised?
Me: I guess not. I did accuse her of sleeping with my brother. Then I called her that something that rhymes with "manipulating bitch".
Jeff!: Expected backlash, Mr. Jerk-Face. You don't even have a brother.
Me: Sigh.

4👍 1👎

emo

What you can claim to be if you have a photo of yourself frowning, while your hair is in your face. This transcends race, class, creed, city, state, country, planet, gender, social status, musical tastes, elevation, religion, clothing choices, sexual orientation, internet connection, political affiliation, and whether your belly button is an "innie" or "outie"(innies are slightly more emo, though).

Me: Hey, check out that emo guy.
Jeff!: Uh, no, wrong. He’s smiling. And also, tragically, sporting a mullet. Therefore, you fail.
Me: He... he's a reverse-emo, then. He's "ome".
Jeff!: Backward hair isn't backward vocabulary, you uncompromising bastard.
Me: Sigh.

5👍 7👎

tornado

Nature's answer to trailer parks.

If you live in a mobile home, and purposely decide to place it anywhere in Tornado Alley, you're not allowed to be upset when an F3 touches down and throws your single-wide a good half-mile away. Sorry.

553👍 118👎

poverty

1. A state of "poor living" characterized by a person, or family, being unable to make enough money in a year to achieve the government-assigned minimum standard.

2. What you can be living in and still afford a computer, broadband internet, and a cell phone, if you're in America.

1. I only made $12,700 last year. This means the government classifies me as "living in poverty".

2. I just got a call on my T-Mobile from CJ and Tonya. They need me to get on my laptop and heal their dungeon group in World of Warcraft. Hooray for poverty.

4👍 23👎