JMAD

A rap name for James Madison, because he's so freaking awesome in US history.

Mr. Spencer. As it says here, JMAD was the one who helped write the bill of rights.

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BoingK

noun: A hypothetical Cross-Country race that is mentioned to mock a certain XC runner’s jumpy style of running, and most commonly used by runners who despite their mockery are often slower than the mocked one.

Grt: “Shogan, why are you bouncing like that? Are you preparing for the BoingK?”

Shogan: “Hush Grt, you tiny child, I can outrun you while wearing sandals.”

Post-Zelda Depression

Noun; The feeling of depression, sadness, or sads a person encounters after finishing any The Legend of Zelda game. This condition sets on immediately after the euphoria when the boss is beaten, as the player suddenly realizes that there is nothing new to play in the game, and he needs to find some other game or hobby to enjoy, similar to parting with a best friend after years of enjoyment.

Post-Zelda Depression, or PZD, can have a prognosis of anywhere between 2 days to the rest of one’s life, but typically lasts until a new Legend of Zelda game is released or bought.

Symptoms include sadness, extreme disappointment, and often hours of doing nothing since someone’s previous occupation has now been reduced to a repeating memory.

I finished Ocarina of Time.
I finally slammed the Master Sword into Ganon’s head, and felt so proud. Then, I realized that the game freezes at the end of the credits. I wouldn’t get to explore my new world without Ganon.

I then realized that all I had left was stuff that I had already done — there were no post-boss tasks, no reward. Only the option to do it again and again.

I developed Post-Zelda Depression for a week. it felt like one of my friends had died. I longed to play more… to talk to Saria one more time…

Eventually , I was able to let it all go, especially after I bought the Wind Waker.

Teaspoon Rule

A theorem used to determine if one has crapped himself. The rule is as follows: if a person farts, and something comes out (also known as a shart), if the resultant mass adds up to less to a teaspoon. If its adds up to more, than one has crapped his pants.

1:
P1: So I thought I crapped myself yesterday, but luckily it didn’t count under the teaspoon rule.

2.
“If you fart, and something comes out, and the stuff is less than a teaspoon, it counts as a fart. But, if it’s more than a teaspoon, then congratulations, you just s*** yourself.”

-Hannes Van Dahl, drummer for Sabaton

Insideout A Capella

That one Latter-Day Saint a capella musical group that every 2000s Mormon mom put on to keep their kids quiet. Musical content ranges from squirrel mutilation to snowmen.

Stereo: ONCE THERE WAS A SNOWMAN, SNOWMAN, SNOWMAN

Me: Huh. It’s been a long time since I’ve heard Insideout A Capella.