Jakob

(Noun): Someone who is unable to close a door or a book without their business partner present.

Steve: “Why is Jakob alone again today? You do realize he can’t close a door, right?”

Jakob: “Hold my non alcoholic beer.”

Josh Baker

Someone who has previously dated Megan Gladden.

Landon: “Did you hear about that guy that dated Megan Gladden?”

Josh2: “You must be referring to Josh Baker!”

Lunsford

A straight dog!! A guy that knows what he wants and grabs it by the horns and takes it. Lunsford‘s tell the truth with no reservations and don’t sugarcoat it or hide it like the average estrogen pumped male. Also considered to be extremely well endowed, so much so to the point that a Lunsford frequently finds his long cack stuck in closed doors, accidentally flushed down the toilet, or left dragging from home while driving down the highway while the shaft derails nearby trains and causes cars to flip.

Tour Guide: “And here we find ourselves in the Sistine Chapel, and if you look up you may notice there is a gaping hole in Michelangelos ceiling. That was caused six months ago when a Lunsford was visiting and got slightly aroused.”

Scott: “Did you see that fat cack laying across the road?”

Dave: “Yeah, must be a Lunsford that forgot to coil it up before he left for work.”

Fox News: “BREAKING, we just received word that the newly built world trade center has been struck and has collapsed. Early reports are saying that a Lunsford stood 500 ft from the building and intentionally unzipped his jeans while screaming “Release the Kraken!” .”