too soon

A phrase used to respond to someone making a comment that was intended to be funny, but touches on subject matter that shouldn't be joked about, usually because it was a recent event (being in the last decade or so).

person1: Ah man, i didn't study for the final. I'm gonna fail for sure

person2: Dude, you're screwed like Steve Irwin in a tank of stingrays.

person1: Too soon.

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ocpd

Obsessive Compulsive Percussion Disorder

Also known as drummer's syndrome. Every drummer has it in some form or another. A person with OCPD cannot restrain themself from constantly tapping and drumming on any surface. Contrary to popular belief, it usually isnt controllable. If you ask someone with OCPD to stop tapping, they'll just do it quietly, and gradually increase the volume until someone yells at them so stop, and the pattern repeats.

You know that guy in your algebra/science/english class who NEVER stops tapping, ever? He can't control it, so leave him alone! And yes, i am a drummer with OCPD.

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boyfriend

Being a boyfriend is like being a dog. You follow your master around, doing what she asks, when she asks, and in return, you receive love and affection. Even when she lets you go, you remain loyal, at least for a while, because being her puppy is a thousand times better than being a stray.

Guy 1: can john hang out?
Guy 2: no, he just became stacu's boyfriend
Guy 1: again, didn't they break up?
Guy 2: yeah, but you know john, loyal as a puppy

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