Ian

Simply the most amazing, perfect, breathtaking, heart stopping individual to ever grace the earth with his presence. You know the Dark Ages? That happened because he wasn't here.

Astoundingly intelligent, hilariously witty, amazingly beautiful, and simply the epitomé of sheer awesomeness. Any words that you can think of that is any way complementary embodies everything that Ian is. Every time someone says the word "Ian" Chuck Norris' hearts stops. The only reason he isn't dead yet is because he's immortal. Like Ian.

Ian selects his friends carefully, as only people who -in some way- reflect his awesome ideals are given the absolute honour and privilege of being called a friend of Ian. Many have died due to sheer ecstasy simply thinking of being named a friend of Ian. The highest honour possibly given to a human being on this planet is being named "Ian's Best Friend", but the position is currently vacant due to the last candidate's head exploding trying to wrap their head around the concept.

Sam: "You know Ian, right?"

Jason: "Of course I know IAN, he's only the supreme emperor of the entire multiverse!"

Sam: "Yeah, well, I heard one time he kicked Chuck Norris in the balls and he thanked him for it"

Jason: "I wouldn't doubt it for a second, it is Ian after all"

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