Freshy fresh

When someone wipes their ass with toilet paper, but because there is still shit left behind, they use a moist wipe to clean the rest up. The term was widely popularized by a teenage girl in a Cottonelle commercial, but it can be used for any toilet paper/moist wipe combination.

"Man, I just took a shit so sloppy that I had to do the freshy fresh."
"Beulah always has skid marks in her panties. Someone needs to teach that girl about the freshy fresh."

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Paul Blart

Derogatory term referring to mall security staff, and on a larger scale, any security guard that doesn't have the authority to issue arrests or carry firearms (see rent-a-cop).

"Hey Paul Blart! I just pissed in the wishing well! What are you gonna do about it?"
"There's a couple Paul Blarts in the food court telling those kids to calm down, but the kids are telling them to fuck off."

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