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Yummy Mummy

Yummy Mummy's are usually between the ages of 30 - mid 40s and congregate in - middle to upper class coffee - shops, Eg ; The indie coffee shops that no one has ever head of and just to get there you have to pass through the gates of fucking Narnia. However they are very partial to Costa coffees (because they have sofas) as well as having spacious tables that allow for their double Decker prams to park comfortably next to them which in turn only allow you a sliver of space to squeeze past. Their Kids are often called : Miles, Teddy, Fred, Stella, Rose, Otto, Rachel, Jane etc.

Their conversation topics range from : bitching about Karen (or Susan ) and their kids exploits, to them organizing when they're gonna try out that new vegan joint, or if they have booked that 'Pilates' session Alex.

They rarely ever drive their own car, rather, their husbands armoured SUV transport which are always in MINT condition on the outside and then look like someone has emptied a bin bag inside.

Finally, if one feels so inclined to get up early enough, you might be able to spot the mob of brisk walking Yummy Mummys with their prams. If they are feeling adventurous or particularly motivated by their most recent argument with their husband they can been seen doing boxing lessons, but after their 15 minutes of weakly smacking pads and making low grunting noises they go to the nearest deli and order a freshly squeezed cow testicle with the blue mint leaves of Tibet.

Here we see the wild Karen, ordering her fresh maqusdfdfdssg with aLmond milk. Looking around with disdain at the other mummy's with smaller prams and comparing if her belly is bigger than hers or if that there boobs look like Pringles tubes

i heard from karon that susan to said to andrew who told janet p not janet r that mark is cheating on rose. {Yummy Mummy gasps can be heard eminating from their micheal.

by BigBattyGyalNathanial October 18, 2018

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