Lets just be friends

The phrase women use when they want to hear your heart actually break.
Often said after weeks of cock teasing.

For maximum effect, normally said when you think you are just about to get in her knickers but she is just about to walk out and get in a taxi with some better looking, fitter, richer guy, infront of all of you work mates.

"Oh I am sorry. I didn't realise you felt that way. You know we could never be anything more than colleagues. Lets just be friends"

*dull snap*

"oh?"

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Take a Blighty

To develop an illness or sustain an inury, possibly self inflicted, which will preclude you from work, but you can still enjoy a rich and varied social life.
Orginates from the 1914-18 War, when reluctant English soldiers would shoot themselves in the foot, to get returned to Blighty, or Great Britan, and invalided out of the Army.
Hangovers can count if passed of as food poisoning

-I intend to get so drunk tonight I will phone in sick tomorrow
-Oh really, are you about to Take a Blighty?

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hypocrocogryph

The ugliest woman in the nightclub.

Probably wearing a cropped top and a short skirt, neither of which should be seen on anyone with such a high bodymass index as her. Most likely owner of a "cheeky devil flicking you the finger" tattoo in some random place on body but due to the huge expanse of flesh and lack of clothing you are going to see it. You will not be sure that the stretch marks are due to her obesity or worse, she has actually had kids!

Inexplicably, seems to be going out with the thinest, weasel faced, rip off designer clad guy in the nightclub.

Always smoking

"Jesus, will you look at the nick of that hypocrocogryph?!"
"That? Oh my God, Do you have you camera phone handy? I need to show the kids what happens when you eat too many McDs!"
"Look she has a boyfriend!"
"She must of shagged him thin, either that or likes his mancumber too much"

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Gunk

gunk is a contrived word made by dick wad US teenagers who have never seen or heard goth music in their entire "sad misunderstood" lives.

Goth IS short for Gothic Punk, always was, way back in the late 70's early 80's, here in the land of all your better musical tastes, the UK.

Go listen to Bauhaus, The Sisters of Mercy or Siouxsie & the Banshees or even The Damned. GOTHS!

"Oo! I am Gunk" that you may be, but you aint a goth!

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