as shallow as piss on concrete

Very shallow and not long-lasting - painting a visualisation of piss quickly soaking in to the concrete.

That girl is so unreliable, she is as shallow as piss on concrete

25👍 11👎

supermarket spastic

An able bodied driver that is in such a hurry he parks in disabled bays at the supermarket

Jerry was in a hurry to buy his beers so he pulled into the disabled space as a supermarket spastic for the night!

4👍 2👎

frog in a blender

Dancing with disjointed movement

At every wedding there is a guy dancing like a frog in a blender, usually the bride's father!

18👍 5👎

Sharp as a Beach Ball

Not too bright and certainly not sharp!
Usefully juxtaposed to something really sharp.
The opposite of "sharp as a razor" - clearcut and incisive.

That guy is as sharp as a beach ball - he didn't even realise the girls were teasing him when they fell on the floor laughing! He was well taken in!

10👍 2👎